Return & Reunion
Introduction
Perhaps you have been deployed several weeks, or even months separated from your family, friends, colleagues and your familiar social environment. Now the day is quickly approaching when you will be going home something you have no doubt been eagerly anticipating! Or perhaps you have been managing the home single-handedly while awaiting your spouse's return. Have you considered that just as you, and those with whom you live and work, were required to make adjustments prior to the deployment, additional adjustments will be necessary once the deployment is over? The purpose of this booklet is to help you do just that - make a smooth transition back into your home, work and social life.
Five Major Areas of Reunion
In an effort to pave the way to your household's successful reunion, we will look at five major areas of reunion:
- Reunion and the single person.
- Reunion and marriage.
- Reunion and children.
- Reunion and single parents; and finally.
- Reunion and work.
Returning is a Process not an Event
Throughout this booklet you will find a major recurring theme about settling back into your home, work, and social environments: 'take things easy' . Why? Because like deployment, reunion is a process, not an event. What does that mean? When you or your partner deployed, it probably wasn't after a morning notification followed by a same-day departure. Rather, you and your family went through a preparation process over several weeks or even months. This involved attending pre-deployment meetings/training, medical and dental checks, immunisations, weapon training, reviewing checklists, packing bags, and so on. It also involved the partner who stayed at home, friend or neighbour, learning how to temporarily take over some of the deployment person's responsibilities, such as child care, car maintenance, gardening, balancing the home accounts etc.
Feelings
As you were trying to take care of numerous projects and responsibilities prior to the deployment, you may have experienced some tension in your relationships at home as well as at work. Perhaps you were irritable at times with your spouse, children, or even your work colleagues. At the same time, you may have noticed some resentment towards you for leaving, even though the deployment was not of your choosing. Young children may be unable to understand why their mother or father have to go away, no matter how carefully the need is explained to them. The person preparing to deploy may have felt guilty about leaving their family and colleagues with all those additional responsibilities. However, such unpleasant emotions as tension and irritability may have served a purpose as you prepared for the deployment; in that they helped create some temporary emotional distance making it easier for you and those you care about to say farewell.
Time and Effort
Again, just as deployment was a process that required time and effort, the process of reunion will also require time and effort.
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